(This isn't from one particular site, because there are different breeds on every list, so I just compiled all the different ones I could find.)

STANDARD POODLE: None. Go get human, sit under it, look up and point it out -- then go lie down in disgust that it took so long.

BORDER COLLIE: Just one. And he'll rewire the house while he's at it.

GOLDEN RETRIEVER: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?

PUG: Er, two. Or maybe one. No -- on second thought, make that two. Is that OK with you?

POMERANIANS: don't change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a German Shepherd in to do the job for them while they're out.

Afghan:
Light bulb? What light bulb?

SHI-TZU: Puh-leeze, darling. Let the maid do it.

Mastiff:
Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.

Malamute:
Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.


LABRADOR: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I?
CanI?

DOBERMAN: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.

C*cker Spaniel: Why change it? I'm just as cuddly in the dark.

ROTTWEILER: Just one. You want to make something of it?

JACK RUSSELL TERRIER: Two, but the job never gets done, they just keep arguing about who is suppose to do it and how it's suppose to be done.

BULLDOG: Just one, but it takes them 3 years to do it.

POINTER: I see it!!! There it is!!!! I see it!! Right there!!

GREYHOUND: It isn't moving......so who cares!!

GERMAN SHEPHERD: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

BOXER: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark....

CHIHUAHUA: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

IRISH WOLFHOUND: Can somebody else do it? I've got this hangover....

AUSTRALIAN SHEPHERD: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

WEST HIGHLAND TERRIER
I'll change it in my own way, on my own time, at my own speed.

DACHSHUND
You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

Briard: I'll only do this once……

Scottie: Boring…too out of reach to pee on

Bernese Mountain Dog: LIGHT bulb? You KNOW I don't like LIGHTning! I'll bury it in a deep hole in the backyard and then chew on the deck.

Beagle: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I ate was a light bulb?

American Eskimo
A. I can show you 12 ways to screw the bulb.

Belgian Shepherd Dogs
A. I've looked the problem over (I needed a good view, so I gracefully jumped on the dining room table for a look-see). And now will casually leap completely over the coffee table to balance easily on the back of the sofa to change that light bulb.

Catahoula Leopard
A. I guess I can change it. After all I need the light to read by.

Coonhound
A. Hey, it's just a dog changing a lightbulb. Don't get so hung up in details. Where's the blanket I stole from the greyhound?

Deerhound
A. If I sleep on the couch long enough, the sun will come up, and no-one will NEED to change the light bulb.

Giant Schnauzer
A. If I stand here and stare at my owner long enough, she'll change it and give me cookies while she's doing it!

Great Dane
A. Just give me back my blanket and do it yourself.

Keeshond
A. I started to change it, but discovered that the job requires an opposable thumb. Instead, I ate the pumpkin pie I found on the counter, an activity easily accomplished in the dark!"

Papillon
A. The bulb is burned out? I couldn't tell from under the covers.

Shetland Sheepdog
A. Hey! Hey! There's a light bulb over here that needs changing! Hey! Hey! I don't CARE if you're sleeping! Hey! Get over here and take care of this!

Smooth Fox Terrier
A. Who needs lights--Rats come out in the dark from the tunnels.

-- Edited by Sister Ray at 01:52, 2007-01-02